The Hock Online Empire blew its last flat tire.  He may not have been banned from Myspace like he has been from numerous other sites, but that was for the better because tonight, something better than a myspace ban occured before many watchful eyes.

The post first surfaced in Mydrama about 9:40PM EST.  A small team of individuals obtained access to John Hock’s Myspace and main AIM accounts.  They quickly worked to deface and obliterate Hocks approximate 40,000 friend count and cruise through his messages posting n00dz of girls dumb enough to give them to Hock.  The friend count hit rock bottom and saw John there.  Now his top four are the ones who brought him down.

Truly epic work.  All his work, all his efforts evaporated in a matter of minutes.  The best part was watching the friend count diminish till finally there was not a single friend.  Right where it belonged.

http://www.myspace.com/johnhockftw

Center for Lollatology <3

Jenny Thompson, self-proclaimed Targé employee extraordinaire and the allegedly retarded offspring of a drug addict mother, made the extremely unwise decision to welcome John Hock into her home. Old news, sure—there will always be dumb stickam sluts hungry for the views attendant on Hock’s popularity.  But StickyDrama deemed it newsworthy that Jenny recently confided to her friend Heidi Lee that Hock might have orally infected her with a sexual disease.

Incredibly, Jenny doesn’t seem to be very concerned. In fact she’s throwing caution into the wind, sharing chapstick (or herpes medication) with the very person who might have infected her:

Not smart.

Evidence of Hock’s promiscuity—and the obvious consequences arising therefrom—is largely anecdotal but nevertheless overwhelming. Many of his personal acquaintances insist he has some type of STD: After he had committed statutory rape against her, Danielle Alexandria claimed that Hock had chlamydia; his former good pals Brookie and Koti Clarke mention crabs, among a few other lulzy tidbits.

Aside from warning Hock’s fans of his sexual health, the above video was Brookie’s response to the psychotic voicemail Hock left her which was posted a few days ago in MyDrama. Hock blamed Brookie for the demise of his relationship with Ericka, a close friend of Brookie; Brookie had alerted Ericka to Hock’s online infidelities.

So to sum things up: If you welcome Hock into your home, he’ll infect you with venereal disease, spam your phone number, cost you hundreds of dollars, harass your friends and kick you in the head. Form a line, girls!

http://www.stickam.com/jennythompson

http://www.stickam.com/johnhock69

Center for Lollatology <3

The filth that is John Hock has officially made his transcontinental move from LA to the heat of TX and now to the bitter cold of Connecticut.  He is also officially on his hunt for cunt to warm his cock.  John’s taste in minor girls seems to have followed him to Connecticut.  John left a truly wonderful drunk dial message to the very adorable, very underage Sara.

Here is a transcript to the best of the CFL’s ability:

“Its John Hock, and i just wanted to say I really want to stick my dick in your mouth.  So uh, instead of calling this number back cause its not mine, write me on myspace when you get this so I can come to stick my dick in your mouth.  I’m really wasted but… I’m not gonna…bullshit you I just really wanna fuck your brains out. [om nom nom blah]“

http://www.stickam.com/xsarax / http://www.myspace.com/omg_saraaa

http://stickam.com/johnathonhock

Center for Lollatology <3

In a fuzzy daze from repetitive banning, John Hock issued his final concession.  While people with jobs were busy sleeping very early Monday morning, John Hock was busy confirming the end of one career and the dawning of a new era of John Hock.  A new one which involves a tad less clothing and a dash less annoyance.

Lora reports in Mydrama.

http://stickam.com/johnathonhock

We figured Hock would be banned from Blog TV in a month, but about approximately 9:00 AM EST today, the news came in.  HOCK IS GONE FROM BLOG TV!

It took the Rapist a week of drunkenness and preaching against Jews and faggots to get himself banned from yet another broadcasting site.

The Rapist replied to the site’s decision the only way he knows how:  with a bulletin, to all his underage girlfriends on Myspace.

Asking people to call Blog TV—as if they give a flying fuck. The number posted in Hock’s bulletin is in fact NOT Blog TV headquarters, but from a Stickam user who lives in Canada, whose parents contacted the local police and pressed charges against the Rapist this morning.  Posting private numbers on Myspace is a violation of their TOS, and we can only hope he gets banned from there also.

Please Hock, if it gets too tough on the streets, and you can’t take losing your “Scene King” crown, make sure to get a hold of a Nokia phone and commit your suicide on Stickam Mobile. Your fans would appreciate it.

What’s next for Hock besides a corner on Hollywood Boulevard and a crack pipe?  Whatever it is, I’m sure we’ll post it here.

We would love to post his link at this spot, but since he has nothing anymore, we’ll link to a generic page.

John Hock

Love,
Anthony Vanity

We’ve seen his cock.  We’ve seen his T&A (taint & ass).  We may now see the blind, swift sword of justice looming over Corey Pattakos head, threatening to strike.  As happens all too often, light-hearted tomfoolery becomes a legal mess.

The events take us to Phoenix, AZ, the original stompin’ grounds of Pattakos and Stickam outcast John Hock.  In the days before Hock’s face was one big contraceptive, both Pattakos and Hock were influential figures in the Phoenix ‘scene‘ and were arguably founders to this scene.  A scene which by most accounts has deteriorated from a well organized orgy of drugs and teen sex, into a now cancerous remnant of teens scattered in cold, damp basements.  Hock jetted off to LA to get busy suckin cock and Pattakos got busy with other things. Namely drugs, drugs and more drugs.

Back in February 2008 Pattakos made a call to friend Shanna telling her that his girlfriend Alex had broken up with him and that he was hoping she could come and hang out with him because things were rough.  Shanna went to hang out with Corey and together they got drunk and coked up.  Corey had the great idea to get some ‘myspace pictures’ in the bathroom.  The two coked up hotties not only took pictures but also decided to get their fuck on in that very bathroom.

While Corey was goin to town on her pussy he went the extra mile and recorded a clip.  Corey left more than his share of positive ID in the video, as was his intention.  The video quickly made its way around at the hands of Corey undoubtedly becoming quite the party favor.  This video materialized into a post in the n00dz when it was anonymously sent to Sticky by Corey.  The only problem for Corey is that Shanna claims to be 16 in the video, something which she is apparently able to prove.  And lucky for her no rape kits needed with a video like this.

Shanna, like most, did not envision herself splashed online in Corey’s amateur porno.  Shanna was hearing as early as the next day about the video.  On top of this she finds out that Corey never in fact was split from Alex at all.  Was this surprising that the great Pattakos would lie to a girl?  No.  By this time Corey had garnered himself a reputation of being a sleazy cokehead willing to do anything to score.  He stole cash and a gas card from his then girlfriend Alex and operated a lil gas for coke operation.  One of Corey’s past best friends Chonga Ivy also witnessed Corey’s slimy side when she found proof it was he and a friend who had broken into and stolen from her house.  Shanna went to both Alex and Chonga explaining what happened and that Corey had cheated.

So now Corey the Clepto-Cokehead finds himself in a bit of a sticky situation.  According to Arizona State law, Shanna has up to 7 years to enjoy holding Pattakos testicles in her vice grip.  This non-violent class-6 felony of statutory rape could put Pattakos behind bars for up to 1 year. The real trouble are all the legal implications that could come with possessing and disseminating what is legally defined as ‘child pornography’ which would start at 10 years.  Groundwork for such a case has already long been lain but as to whether final initialization will take place is yet to be determined and is largely up to Shanna.

The statutory aspects of the case are similar to what happened with the very public case of Jamie Lynn Spears & Casey Aldridge.  Much the same except Corey was in fact 19 whereas with Adridge there was confusion as to whether he was 18 or 19 years old (And Aldridge didn’t recklessly spread video evidence).

“If [Aldridge] is 18, no crime has been committed.  If he is 19, however, Aldridge could be charged with a felony carnal knowledge of a juvenile.”

Things haven’t been fine and dandy for Shanna.  She is admittedly no angel and in our opinion Corey may have lucked-out that it was Shanna.  She swears that she didn’t know he was recording.  Not only did Shanna suffer the very public exposure as Pattakos’ fuck buddy but even more recently she went through yet another interesting episode.  The hottie was offered $1,500.00 USD for a private cam show which she agreed to do.  In a cruel and lullzy twist, she received her $1,500.00…… in monopoly money.

• Pattakos:  http://www.stickam.com/coreypattakoss / Myspace
• Hock: http://stickam.com/johnathonhock
• Shanna:  http://www.stickam.com/lollipopppp
• Chonga Ivy:  http://www.stickam.com/chongaivy
• Alex: http://www.stickam.com/ohyesss
• Center For Lollatology <3

John Hock has done what no other person had been able to do:   He got his own Stickam account permanently banned.

Earlier today, as he was drinking alcohol and flirting with pyromania, Hock thought it would be cute to engage in some on-cam oral sex with a female guest.  He also appeared naked, albeit cupping his unimpressive sexual equipment with his hands.

Stickam Admins didn’t see the humor.  While there seems to be some debate as to whether the oral sex was simulated or genuine, his account was banned early this morning.  StickyDrama’s usual sources inside Stickam’s headquarters say that employees all had a good laugh at Hock’s misfortune, and they have no intention of restoring the whiny no-talent statutory rapist’s account.  Moreover, Hock’s campaign to bombard Stickam with demands to restore his account has, if anything, only further annoyed the staff and increased their resolve to keep his profile banned.

As happens with any banned account, Hock no longer appears in Stickam’s rankings.  All his previous hard work has been erased forever, as if he had never accomplished anything.

Shortly after the ban, Hock’s roommate Johnny Death came into our chatroom.  Johnny, whom no one would accuse of having an abundance of brains, pled with StickyDrama and Anthony Vanity to use our connections inside Stickam to have Hock’s account restored.  We couldn’t have replied more venomously than Anthony, although our grammar would have been a tad better:

Johnny claimed that Hock was “crying” and would soon be “homeless” without his Stickam profile, which is his bread and butter.  Hock used the account to send traffic to his “Picture Your Prize” website, a rigged contest whose winners were selected according to the favors the did in return for Hock.  “Picture Your Prize” is owned by Hock’s gay sugardaddy, Tom Zina, as StickyDrama reported in July.

Furthermore, Johnny claimed that Hock was packing his suitcases and moving back to Arizona, presumably to live with Jenna Hock, his adoptive mother.  Oh yes—did you notice that link?  Jenna Hock does indeed have a Myspace account where readers can find links Hock’s adoptive siblings, who come in a wide assortment of colors.

And our personal favorite:

By all accounts, Ms. Hock is ashamed of her son.  She said so herself in a Myspace message to the statutory rapist, written after Ownage Pranks called and convinced her that John had died–a cruel prank executed at John’s request.

CLICK TO HEAR OWNAGE PRANK HOCK’S MOM

After that call, Hock’s mom wrote this:

His mother’s above message and subsequent phonecalls (during which the self-professed “Jesus freak” is rumored to have told her son to die and burn in hell) took their toll even on a worthless emotionally under-developped slimeball like Hock.  He broke down on cam during one of his shows:

The black moments are actually Hock turning off his cam to hide his tears.  He did have the fortitude to plug “Picture Your Prize” inbetween sobs.

Whether Hock indeed will return to Arizona, or attempt to rebuild his viewership is unclear.  Despite Johnny Deaths’s claim that Hock was abandoning his dreams of online fame and fortune, Hock apparently created a new account later this afternoon, with a slightly modified URL.  As of this post, the account had 25 friends and 0 total live views.  Just for lulz, StickyDrama shall forever henceforth link only his original banned profile.

Congrats on winning our “Keep Hock Off the Air” contest, John!  Like our new banner?

http://stickam.com/johnathonhock

What more lulzy antics can we expect from Myspace’s sexiest bad-boy, Hilton Suicide?

For a sneak-preview, we have but to watch these disgraceful screen-recordings of John Hock. Readers submitted all these light-hearted clips, which have nothing in common besides portraying the former “King of Stickam” as a pathetic Princess among lol-cows.

See her Majesty:

- feign outrage at the suggestion she is interested in underage girls

- take a huge bong rip, and then immediately plug “Picture Your Prize”

- cry like a baby to Andy after a rogue mod kicked her Live empty

- rub up against Chris Crocker’s hard tranny cock

- eloquently describe “a certain vagina” she wants to fuck

- set her back yard on fire

- randomly pull out her testicles

Oh Adam! We certainly hope there’ll be no logo covering “Hilton’s” bawlz.

http://www.stickam.com/johnathonhock

http://www.myspace.com/hiltonsuicide

StickyDrama was among the many faggots who found themselves unable to PM hearts to cute boys this week.

Now, hearts appear as a nonsensical string of characters. The problem occurs only in PMs, not main chats; and it occurs in both chatrooms and LIves. No official word for the reason behind this latest Stickam snafu, but rumor is that it’s a side-effect of the company’s efforts to prevent Carb0n and Rancid’s chatroom attacks, or their usurpation of user’s sessions.

Fie, a thousand times fie on Stickam’s developers, who have denied us our hearts in order to protect an annoying spamming statutory rapist.